Once upon a time in my life, I directed a day care center with about forty-five preschoolers enrolled. They are all grown-ups now, living productive lives and blessing may heart every time I hear from one of them. Hearing from one is what prompted me to tell this story, for which I did ask permission.
I had just grabbed my purse that morning and was headed out the door to run errands. I knew it would take a couple of hours, and if I left immediately I could get back in time to help with lunch. I was standing up to leave when Emily appeared at the office door. Her big brown eyes were snapping, her little jaw was set, and she was poised to resist whatever she was about to encounter with everything in her four-year-old soul.
By this time in my career, I had earned the sad title of “The Spanking Lady.” We tried to limit the use of such corrective behavior. A well-placed swat on the derriere was always used as a last resort, and only the Director was allowed to administer it. I could see from Emily’s face where we were headed.
I don’t have any idea now what the original infraction had been, but I know willful disobedience had been the root. And we had a rule about willful disobedience. What’s worse, Emily’s dad had a back-up rule: If Emily earned herself a trip to my office, she had to take my correction like a lady.
I took another look at Emily and knew things were not going to go well. Then, an unexpected thought flitted through my head. Before I could think it over, I said, “Emily, do you want to go for a ride with me?”
We stopped at the gas station first. Emily was still silent and apparently braced for the scolding to come. It was almost morning snack time, so I bought myself a Diet Coke, and I got a bottle of chocolate milk and a bag of M&M’s for my little charge. She smiled.
I don’t remember what we talked about on that drive twenty years ago. I only remember the pleasure of riding down the road together, sipping our drinks and sharing our M&M’s. I have thought about that day many times. Especially on occasions when I think God must be looking at me, shaking His head, and saying, “I know she needs a good spanking right now, but I’m going to give her My mercy instead.”
So, here is to Mercy. To chocolate milk and M&M’s. To sweet Emily. And to not always getting exactly what we deserve.
Have you heard that old Newsboys song? “When we don’t get what we deserve, it’s a real good thing. When we get what we don’t deserve, it’s a real good thing.”
I like this story. It’s certainly my preferred method for dealing with myself. This kind of drive works a lot better than the ol’ pull yourself by the bootstraps thing.
This is the most excellent example of the phrase “Children spell love, T-I-M-E”. I’m sure that Emily as well as the rest of us ALWAYS have profited from God or anyone just simply spending time with us rather than just administering discipline, in whatever form.
I’m not sure I’ve heard the song, Eleanor, but I like the theme. And thanks for dropping by Serenity and Andrea. We are obviously like-minded.
I will never, ever forget those M&Ms and chocolate milk.
Very few people "get" me, and Kathy you are absolutely one of them.
Thank you for the love that I will always cherish.
It is mutual, Emily.
Ah yes, I remember those days well. Though I loved my job, it was so hard to leave my Emily. I often would come pick her up from daycare and get a list of offenses from the day (such as emptying the closet with Jordan instead of napping like all good children should). Oh my. Then one day I came to pick her up and got the milk and m & m story instead. Thank you, Kathy, for that day. It sweetened not only that day, but all those other days as well.
Stacy (Emily's mom)
p.s. I do know Emily was – and is – a stinker. That's part of why I love her so much. 🙂
Thanks for letting me be a part of her life, Stacy. She is a treasure.