I went to school a long time ago. It was before computers, or cell phones, or calculators. Wendell and I actually took out a bank loan to buy his first calculator for college in the 1970’s. It cost $300, and you can buy a similar model for five bucks at WalMart these days. Anyway, I loved two things in school that seemed to have nothing in common: Diagraming sentences and casting out nines.
The sentence thing makes perfect sense. I’ve loved words since the day I first saw Jane run in Mrs. Epperson’s classroom. Diagramming was a pleasant game for me. Ā I was happier when the teacher announced we were going to diagram on a Friday afternoon than I was when she mentioned a field trip or a Valentine’s Day party.
Casting out nines, on the other hand, has nothing to do with words. But I think I understand why I liked it. I hated math, and the feeling was mutual. Whereas words seemed to love me and leap into my soul in all manner of delightful ways, numbers generally scattered and ran down the hall when they saw me coming. Algebra equations left me in actual tears. They were the worst, because they dangled those tantilizing letters as if the formula might actually have something to do with words. But no! In this game, Y is a number. Traitor.
Anyway, Casting Out Nines, finally gave me the power. This is an archaic method of adding a long column of numbers. It was used back in the days when brain power was the only technology available. You just go down the list and add up the 3’s, 4’s, 5’s and so forth in sums of nine. Then you multiply the nines. (and add any leftovers)
I probably made that sound complicated, but it is quite simple. And lovely. It forces numbers (or are they called numerals?) to line up and behave. They are caught!
So, I was thinking today that I loved diagraming and casting out nines because I have an inherent need to bring order to chaos (a godly trait) or an outstanding ability to manage information and make it accessible (good stuff for a writer.) But then I had this horrible thought:
Maybe I loved those things because we got to stand in front of the entire class and write on the chalkboard to do them.
It probably turns out I just like attention. Sheesh.
Hahahahahahahah! I’m laughing so hard. I had no idea where you were going with this because I definitely have that order-to-chaos syndrome right now. But the chalkboard thing is probably SO TRUE!
In all seriousness, though, I think the two activities do have a lot in common, and anything that makes math simple is my friend too. I’ve actually never heard of the 9 thing. They do it with 10s now, which actually seems even easier, don’t you think?
Yeah. Tens would make way more sense to me. I’m not sure why we did nines. Was that Mrs. Marsh’s trick for getting us to memorize our times tables?
You crack me up. Just a big attention-hog. HA!!!! š
I was totally waiting for you to go somewhere spiritual with this. š But I got an nice surprised pleasant feeling when you didn’t.
Also, I knew my parents used slide rulers instead of calculators in school, but I didn’t know a calculator was so expensive! Crazy how things change. Today I sent Jason a text message asking if he got my first two texts. Then I realized that 10 years ago if I’d asked if he got my texts, it would have meant he was picking up my school books.
LOL! That was so great! I totally relate to the math deal! But the ending of this post was the BEST! I’m still laughing!
I’m glad my vanity could give you girls a laugh.
simply delightful!
I also loved to diagram sentences, even though it is not a skill taught in school anymore. I had a chance to thank Mrs. Thompson before she passed away for teaching me proper grammar and parts of speech in the 6th Grade. I don’t remember casting out nines at all. I have a mental block about math, also!
I’m so glad you got to thank Mrs. Thompson. She was one of my favorite people ever.
I always like diagraming as well, and find myself doing it when I read; finding the verbs, adjectives, and noticing how they relate back to the noun. That casting out nines, yeah I’m glad there was SOMETHING about math you understood and enjoyed, I actually never found a thing.
I also want to thank you for the twist at the end, I love twists, and yours made me smile š