Our books weren’t on the Bestseller table that day, but we had a blast anyway.

This morning, I got all jealous over Jen Hatmaker and her new book. Before you start writing in the comments about how jealousy is a sin: Let me assure you I repented before I even finished my morning Diet Coke. And before you start reminding me not to compare one gift (or one set sales figures) to another: Let me tell you the rest of the story.

I’d like to say I wasn’t jealous of her sales figures. But then I’d have to add lying to my morning list of failures. She actually thanked her readers in this blog post for helping her build schools and houses for poor people. I’d say her book sales have done slightly better than mine.

And then, of course, I had to wrestle with the question of whether or not I would do such things if my books did become best-sellers. Sheesh. Now the motive thing? This inventory of my soul is getting painful.

Anyway, I rumbled these things around for a while and tried to decide what was really bothering me. As usual, it came back to that nagging sense that maybe I had wasted too much time in my life. Here is Jen Hatmaker, young enough to be my daughter, using her writing gift so effectively that she is impacting people all over the world with her books and their proceeds.

Before I had time to start listing the contrasts between us, though, I suddenly remembered Mark. Mark has only been walking with God a few years, and the story of his life is amazing. He leads worship at our church, and he loves to sing. But he hates to talk. A couple of Sundays ago, he told the church, though, that something I had written in the church bulletin encouraged him a great deal. It gave him hope that he could make a difference in somebody’s life by doing something simple like smiling. “I think Kathy might have written this week just for me,” Mark said.

I felt the Holy Spirit whisper, “And wouldn’t that have been enough?”

Why, yes. Yes, it would. If nothing else I ever write in this life makes a difference, it would all have been worth that one short article that gave Mark the power to preach through a smile.

I didn’t write this post so you could all tell me what a great writer I am and help me feel better. I’m really pretty secure in who God called me to be.

Nor did I write it so Jen Hatmaker could get a pingback, discover my talent, and whoosh me off to her agent. (Well, maybe I did, actually. That motive thing again. It is so sneaky!!!)

I hope, though, that I wrote this post so you would remember the things you are doing in your own life that make a difference.

Large or small.

They matter.

Now, go check out Jen Hatmaker’s new book. It looks amazing.